Post 7 ֎ Honoring Marital Vows

“Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness.” (The Family: A Proclamation to the World).

The world in which we live in today has a lot of grey areas. In The New Testament the Savoir gave the following commandment: “But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart” (Matthew 5:28),

Infidelity can occur on many different levels. The three types of infidelity I learned about in my studies this semester covered the following areas:

1 - Visual infidelity: “Pornography, is perhaps the most common type of unfaithfulness. And the physical aspect of pornography involves the common practice of self-stimulation while viewing pornography” (Hawkins et al pg. 61).

2 - Romantic infidelity: “When an individual becomes emotionally involved with a specific person other than his or her spouse” (Hawkins et al pg. 61).

3 – Sexual Infidelity: “In contrast to romantic infidelity, sexual infidelity (physical/attached) occurs when a person engages in sexual acts outside the bonds of marriage with or without emotional attachment” (Hawkins et al pg. 61).

Pornography is the most common form of infidelity of the world we live in today. In social settings some guys will make it sound like this kind of infidelity is acceptable. Comments like: “One danger of lending out your phone is that they see your porn browsing history on your phone” or: “We are guys, there is nothing wrong with this, it is just the way we are” condone this practice.

The problem with giving into this kind of socially acceptable behavior is that some individuals may start off with visual infidelity and then end up with sexual infidelity. The reasons for this is the same as being a gambler or an alcoholic. Pornography is essentially an addiction; the more one yields to it, the more changes there are that at some point the viewing is just not enough anymore and starts spilling over into romantic and sexual infidelity. Pornography is often harder to give up than alcohol or drugs and may take many years to fully recover from.

“Clearly, unchastity and infidelity bring serious consequences such as the rippling, even haunting, effects of illegitimacy and fatherlessness, along with disease and the shredding of families. So many marriages hang by a thread or have already snapped. This quiet but deep crisis coexists with vexing international crises in our time, including war. Jesus spoke of latter days when there would be “distress of nations, with perplexity” and how all things would be in commotion” (Maxwell, Neal A. “The Seventh Commandment a Shield” General Conference, October 2001)

Fortunately there is always hope and always an opportunity to change. I have personally seen how marriages can end up being healthy and happy again, as long as the spouse who has done the wrong thing is willing to change and the other is willing to support and help. The Family Proclamation states that forgiveness is key to a happy and successful family life.

“it shouldn’t be surprising that many married people admit they have considered divorce, yet of those who have considered divorce, more than 90 percent say that they are glad to still be married to their spouse” (Hawkins et al pg. 75)